Being a Better Ally: 2020

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As we go into the next decade, many men are looking for advice on how to better support their non-cis-gendered employees, coworkers, neighbors, friends, and/or family.

Editor’s note: I wrote this post in the first weeks of 2020, but didn’t publish it for six months. It feels simultaneously out of date and yet still full of relevant advice as I publish it now, in July.

New Years’ Eve

I only went to one NYE party this year. It was nice to catch up with a few friends… but I did not expect a gender inquisition!

It’s been a while since those acquaintances last saw me, and I guess they had a whole lot of ideas about gender, trans*rights, and allyship that they just had to ask me …

In light of that evening’s conversations (which I quote throughout this article), I have compiled a list of things you can do to be a better ally to the trans* people in your life.

I humbly offer this post that it may provide some benefit to the world.

May the 2020s be a more inclusive and equitable decade than the one that came before, and may that growth ease the suffering of people of all genders and sexualities.


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Transitioning Is An Act Of Strength

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A friend said to me, “You gave up everything I’ve spent my life fighting for. I can’t imagine how much you must have been hurting inside to choose to do that,” so I wrote a blog post about that.

Gender Markers

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Yesterday, the Washington State Department of Licensing held a public hearing for comments on the proposed legislation to add an ‘X’ gender marker option on state-issued ID’s. I chose to go and my story.

Jeeping about

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I loved my lesbaru, but I traded up for a Jeep and love it! This summer, I’m searching for offroad trails in the Cascades.